Sunday, April 23, 2006

MAX TURBO

Tomek, your image hasn't served me well in Poland.

Your curly poofy hair. Your nerd glasses. Your slim figure. Your love of wearing scarves in warm weather.

Too many times now Polish Buraki (meatheads) with their shaved heads and their Puma runners have snickered and giggled as you've passed by. Too many times you've just nearly avoided getting punched in the face. Too many times people have called you 'gej'.

No. This night Tomek died. And MAX TURBO was born...


The last photo of Tomek Roszkowski before intensive Image Reconstruction Surgery.

Tomek
RIP
Oct 14, 1977 - April 22, 2006.

Neither Tomek, nor MAX TURBO, this in between entity had no name, no soul and no chance of getting laid.
Hello, Polish girls. The name is MAX TURBO. And yes, I fuck on the first date.

Hi, Polish Buraki. The name's MAX TURBO. I came here for two reasons, to eat pierogi, and to kick some ass....and I'm all out of pierogi.
Hi, Polish television audience. No, I'm not that guy from the new show Starsky & Hutch that premiered last week on PolSAT. I'm MAX TURBO.

11 Comments:

Blogger ljushuset said...

MAX TURBO, you're making me leak!

6:59 PM  
Blogger nicki said...

oh dear lord...tell me you're joking :P hahahahaha

9:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

łałłł :]

11:13 PM  
Blogger littleandie said...

oooooohhhhh MAX TURBO!!!!!!!! *swoon*

After Andie was revived she was unsure whether her swooning was caused by MAX TURBO'S "blue steel" look or the pungent stench of Axe or some other equally economical male fragrance, that MAX TURBO had bathed himself in; a stench so powerful it was smelt across the ocean.

I actually didn't think it was possible to do that with your hair.

11:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anon. *hearts* Max T 4 Ever

5:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ey bitches, MAX TURBO is my!

6:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Y-y-y-you're dead, f-f-f-fucker.

2:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gimme more Max Turbo - all day, all the time!

2:33 AM  
Blogger littleandie said...

Mu's right,
You look like a "Sloan Ranger," I wonder if they are still called that.
I had completely forgot about them.

12:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No teraz to dopiero prawdziwy z Ciebie gej... BRAWO!!!wd

10:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ey Anonymous, jesteś u Pani!

10:59 AM  

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